i n • p u r s u i t

Today was fairly eventful. Though, I've yet to declutter my apartment. ::sigh:: I went to work this morning. Until school starts, I'm going to be working every morning instead of all day, every other day. It's actually kind of nice because I wake up early and get through work and still have the rest of my day. After work, Heather and I had our picnic. :-) It was lots of fun, once again. This time, a mommy duckie came 'round with her baby duckies! So cute! She was a selfish mommy and took tried to get the food before the little duckies could peck at it with their little duck bills. I came home and bummed around procrastinating for a while before calling up my friend Steve. We went downtown and had Chinese for dinner. I had initially wanted ice cream but after dinner I was too full. So, back in the car. We headed for Books-a-Million in hopes that they would have a Catechism. Well, they did. They had two. One was the small, white softcover and the other was the small, whit...

i cannot escape my attempts are futile for i am tempted and i dive in deep i swim among creatures whom i have summoned they make me irrational i dry off though never fully dry or so i convince myself and i am stuck in a tangled confusing web trapped by my illogicalities i hate my illogicalities in eight hours time i shall break free

Sorry about the two-day lapse. Yesterday evening, after the Truth Project, I went to T.G.I.Friday's for dinner with a few friends. I had cheese sticks (some of which the boys stole while I wasn't looking part of the way through...Curtis left me with half of a mangled cheese stick) and a yummy salad with pecans and strawberries. Salad with strawberries always makes me happy. :-) I snagged a ride in Andrew's new RSX . Oooh , it's pretty. I'd love a car like that, but it's not very car seat friendly--a must for me. (Soccer mom before I'm even a mom, say the boys. Oh yes.) After that, we talked about religion and what this religion believes and what this one doesn't. "Okay," I said before I asked a question, "now, you know, you really have to dumb this down for me." I don't get things so well. Things must be seriously dumbed down for me. I ask for answers to be repeated a lot and I ask the same question a several times. And I don'...

Target had a few CD's on sale for only $7.98 yesterday. So I decided, what the heck, I'll get 'em. Plain White T's :: Every Second Counts Boys Like Girls :: Boys Like Girls The Almost :: Southern Weather The first two sound like very typical modern punk music. The third rocks out a bit harder. I say "modern" punk because, obviously, punk isn't what it used to be. It's gone a bit trendy and soft. But the music is fun and in a few days, I'll know the lyrics well enough to sing the songs at the top of my lungs. Because of the song "Hey There Delilah," I was really hoping that the Plain White T's would do for me what Dashboard Confessional did for me back in...oh, what was it...2004? Jason and Patrick introduced me to Dashboard Confessional, and yeah, their music kept me going that year. Leaving the church when the guy I considered my best friend (and fancied myself in love with) was rude to me just because he was a natural-born jerk; zoo...

This previous Wednesday was the last powwow of the summer. I was excited about going because the previous week, I had finally found my groove. I really felt good about my dancing. Also, this was going to be the last time I would to get to see all the guys this summer before they dispersed to various universities this fall. While I did get to see people, the evening was just sort of not what I had hoped it would be. I did not dance good at all! It wasn't until the friendship dance that I finally got my rhythm again. By that time, well, it's too late. The grass was really slippery for some reason, and I kept feeling like I was going to fall down. It was nice and cool, but that's because the wind was blowin ' like it was about to rain. So that meant no dancing in the meadow. You know, it never did rain. I did get to hang out with a bunch of friends. Some of them are going contra dancing this weekend and invited me along. Anne Marie was there, so that's always a major p...

You know how sometimes you hear a song and you love it but you're not that sure what the words in the song actually are? This song, Paradise by Jenny Lewis and the Watson Twins, sounds much more beautiful that these lyrics! But I felt like posting them anyways. (This is only the last stanza.) Her voice, in the song, it just sounds so....true. I need to get the whole CD. Plus, I love to sing along with it in the car. :-) Of all the men I've known Who have money I like you the most Because every dollar you invent You're even more hell-bent On risking life and limb for another toast When we were falling into puddles I knew you had it in for me Scraped my face on the ground Until blood was down me From my nose to the hem of my jeans And my heart, it is still bleeding But it's fight or flight The exit from loneliness Could be the entrance into paradise Into paradise ♥, Tiffany Anne

Day classes: Probability & Statistics, Geography Night classes: French Internet classes: Astronomy I'll probably add another to my day classes schedules. I've got to go to Greenville Tech on Thursday to get things sorted out. I'll probably end up having to take French II over Christmas break. We shall see. Hopefully, I'll stay with greenvillescene .com and hone my writing skills there and in school. Then, by the time I graduate, I'll have "relevant work experience" and a degree. I just talked to Jeff about how I'm going to stay on. I babbled about how I don't want any one else taking care of my kids and how lucky I am to have this job. Seriously. I am getting crazy good experience that will definitely be useful later in life. I get to play almost all day. I get paid to go to the swimming pool. Also, I just love the family. It's great just being here. The other day, Lauren and I were talking about family and friends and the roles that we h...

I like my friend Caleb. A lot. (Not in the romantic sense.) Every Wednesday (and on the occasional Tuesday), I dump all my crap in his room. After dancing (or ceremony if it is a Tuesday), I hog him for a good part of the evening--if we're up to it--and he listens. He listens to all of my problems and overanalyzing and all my ridiculousness. He just tells it to me like it is. Sure, he'll tell me what I want to hear sometimes, but we both know he's just doing that to make me feel better. At the end of the evening, he walks me out to my car to ensure that a certain someone else doesn't offer to. As a fellow staffer, he gets it; he gets the way we all act around each other and doesn't draw any unnecessary conclusions out of it. He doesn't flirt with me and steers me clear of boys. "Tiffany," he said tonight, "don't you dare go down that path!" I guess, what is really on my mind is that it's nice to have some super-duper friends. When you...

Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) set to music by Baz Luhrmann originally penned by Mary Schmich Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of ’99 If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience…I will dispense this advice now. Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked….You’re not as fat as you imagine. Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind tha...

I totally want these QC t-shirts! Awesome? I think so. (in blue) ♥, Tiffany Anne

I didn't post too much last week, I'm sorry. I must have you guys so bored. ;-) Well, here's a little wrap up. Monday , I worked all day. Janelle, Alex & Lauren took Janet to the airport so I had some alone time with Davis. I think I actually blogged about that. That evening, after work, I went to the Mary Kay meeting so I could get all glam for the MK Model of Beauty contest. People kept telling me that I looked amazing, but really, it bothered my eyes to be wearing three types of eyeshadow, eye liner, and mascara. I also wore foundation, powder, blush, lip liner, lip stick, and lip gloss. Yikes! I did look pretty glam though, so maybe I'll win and get to go to NYC for a photo shoot (ha!). Afterwards, Kara took me out to dinner at Chick-fil-a and tried to sway me to join MK. Then we talked about all the recent goings on in my life. It was nice to have another girlfriend to chat with. Tuesday , I had a picnic with Heather which I know I blogged about. Go back a few ...

Hey Greenvillians...what are you doing tonight Friday? Check out Cool Hand Luke at Gypsy G's for only FOUR DOLLARS! You won't regret it. ♥, Tiffany Anne

Look, and this American Girl, Kaya , and I are both dancers. Her shawl's too big, just like mine. Ha-ha. :-) By the way, I danced so flippin ' good this past Wednesday. I danced better than I ever have, it was so great! As it was the 6 th Week Powwow (Vigil Call-Out night and Leather revealing night) it was a good time to dance so well. And I got rewarded with Vigil punch. Yes! ♥Tiffany♥

Yesterday, Heather and I had another picnic in the park! I really look forward to my Tuesdays, now. It is so nice talking to Heather. We are totally on the same page with a lot of things. It's also just nice to sit in the shade of a large tree and eat our sandwiches and just people watch. The people watching becomes even more fun when people wade into the water at which point I begin mumuring loud enough for only Heather and I to hear about how sorry I feel for the poor mother who is going to get home and wonder why her son's feet have mutated. Why? Oh because he was wading in the nasty Reedy River! She came over with a cool new picnic basket! Yes! Now, now more carrying around grocery bags of food. It is rather large and, as Heather said, "I kind of feel like Dorothy carrying this around." But seriously, it is super cool. Lunch was: chicken salad, chex mix, strawberries, and snapple raspberry white tea. Yum. And it all fits into a handy-dandy-totally-straight-from-Yo...

I remember the first time I had alone time with Lauren. She was so tiny and still on the monitor. Janelle had taken Alex to get a haircut. So there we were, in the master bedroom. I sat on the bed watching her sleep in her bassinet willing her to wake up so I could see her eyes. No such luck. I picked her up, just to be able to hold her. She was wrapped in the pink blanket with flowers that she still likes. She lay on my chest, stirring a bit, but not waking up. So sweet. So very sweet. I had my first alone time with Davis this morning and it was quite the opposite. Ha-ha. It's not that he cried the *whole* time, but let's just say I ate my lunch while walking in circles and bouncing up and down on the balls of my feet. I am so talented. Ohhh yeah! Okay, so, he was a bit fussy, but he did quiet down. He is just so darn cute and has such beautiful eyes. He's going to grow up to be just as handsome as Alex because they're baby pictures are practically identical! I'm s...

♥, Tiffany Anne

oh goodness...why do i do this to myself? ha-ha ♥, Tiffany Anne

That's Dad's nasty leg. We visited him today after his operation. He'll have those pins in his leg for about two weeks. At that time, he'll have an actual surgery. They couldn't actually cut his leg open or anything yet because everything is so swollen that if they cut him open, they wouldn't be able to close it back! Yikes! I feel so bad for my dad! I couldn't imagine having that in my leg, it is so scary! What if you accidentally bump the pins into something and it jars your bone ! Luckily, he'll be working from home for a while. I told him I was going to post a picture on my blog and he said, "Cool!" ♥, Tiffany Anne

Hey Greenvillians...what are you doing next Friday? Check out Cool Hand Luke at Gypsy G's for only FOUR DOLLARS! You won't regret it. ♥, Tiffany Anne

If Star Wars were real, then this group would be the good side (Yoda's side), and the dark side (The Emperor) would be "Join the Protestant Side." Anyway, this is a board to provide information and support for anyone who is considering becoming Catholic. We will try to provide information for you about what the Church teaches and how everything that the Church teaches is supported by Sacred Scripture and in know ways contradicts it. If you have any questions, feel free to post them on the wall or as a group discussion. If you are not a Catholic and want some info, please, ask a question! I was just invited by a "friend" to join a group on Facebook with the above description. Obviously I know why. What I don't understand, however, is what wonderfully loving person wrote the first sentence. It seriously saddened me. It's a dumb parallel, but if one were to do it accurately, wouldn't all Christians be the good side and Satan be the dark side? Instead of...

Here I am, still listening to Harry Potter & the Order of the Phoenix on CD. I just got home from babysitting Oliver for Mike & Mallie. Man, what a cutie! We had fun, but he was none to pleased to be put down to bed by someone other than Mommy or Daddy. Right now, I'm sitting in my apartment with the windows open for the first time in months. Since the 80 and 90 degree days hit us, it's been A/C only in here. My front room is totally like a sauna. It gets so hot! All of my openable windows are open (some are painted shut) and my box fan is in full force giving the whole place a nice breeze. So, while the kids were napping I missed three calls, one text message, and one picture message--all from my family. What happened? My dad fell of a ladder while painting the barn and broke his ankle. Ouch! I've never broken a bone and hope I never do! What a bummer. He was going in for some type of three letter scan when I called my sister this afternoon amidst decorating the ba...

Back when we used to live at the house on Coleman Drive, I came home one day to find my dad lying on the floor next to the CD player in the dining room listening to Harry Potter & the Sorcerer's Stone . That was really my first introduction to Harry Potter. Despite having seen many a friend carrying the books around school, I had never actually read any of them--or wanted to, for that matter. Then what happened? I became addicted. So addicted that I had pre -ordered the Special Edition of Harry Potter & the Order of the Phoenix from Amazon.com and when it didn't come in on the day of release, I went to the Open Book and bought a copy. The pre -ordered Special Edition came in the mail the very next day. The Special Edition is right next to me on the couch and I have no idea where the other book is. I've spent the last week listening to Harry Potter & the Order of the Phoenix on CD so I could refresh my mind. I'm still listening to it (I'm on chapter ...

I wrote this last semester for my Creative Writing class. It was submitted as a short fictional story. If you want the whole thing (it's about 12 pages) email me a request. I may or may not send it out. ;-) --- “What happened?” I asked softly. My only pair of designer shoes (which are overdue for replacement) made tapping sounds on the sidewalk as we passed the trendy tapas bar frequented by wannabe hipsters and gay men. Our hands were clasped together, and we were seemingly connected, but really distant. We had just left our favorite restaurant: a small, unpretentious, intimate European place where I’m sure that we were the youngest patrons by far. The dimly lit establishment, owned by an older, bickering couple, ran on what seemed to be a bare-bones staff without sacrificing good service. We ordered our usual appetizer of escargot de la maison—snails and mushrooms in a buttery garlicky sauce and matching glasses of merlot. “I hope you both had some,” the waitress said with a ...

I hear the thunder outside and my living room is getting darker and darker. I did get a few things accomplished today. I did the dishes. I went to lunch with Heather. I listened to a message. I turned in my article. There are still a few things I need to do. But instead here I am procrastinating. Oh well. :-) Some of my friends have been beyond super this past week and I am so grateful. I think it is rather significant when friends who truly care offer words of comfort, offer their time, or even do something like giving me a FB "hug"--yes, that made me feel better. It just shows that they care enough to let you know they care. Jeff has been sending me funny pix messages every few days--or even two a day!--that never fail to make me smile. This one (Mary is making an ass of herself) is my favorite: Yesterday, I met up with Sarah for "coffee." Funny how we say that and then she gets tea and I get a strawberry smoothie. Ha-ha. After that, I went to Ali's for a din...

A friend shared this with me literally 10 seconds ago. I had to share. I didn't really think that they ate cats. I just couldn't believe it. I was wrong. ♥, Tiffany Anne Chinese Cat Lovers Halt Truck Hauling Cats to Restaurants SHANGHAI, China — Chinese cat lovers mobilized online to save a truck load of cats from the cooking pot, a newspaper reported Tuesday. Veteran Shanghai cat rescuer Duo Zirong started off her mission of deliverance on Friday when she called police to stop a truck stuffed with some 800 live cats, the China Daily said. The standoff happened at a parking lot in a southern suburb of Shanghai. It continued for hours while cat lovers spread word of the incident online, eventually raising $1,320 in donations to buy the whole load. They now hope to place them in homes after posting their pictures and profiles on the Internet. "They were so frightened," it quoted one of the rescuers, Huo Puyang, as saying. "Some bit people when they tried to let th...

♥Tiffany♥

Last night, I went over to Brent's and it ended up being a usual evening at his place and I stayed until 5am. Ha-ha. I can't be a night owl like that too often! A few of us hung out, made sushi, and watch L'Auberge Espanol. I've never made sushi before but it was pretty fun--and I did a pretty good job. I banked that on my Asian blood...despite the fact that I'm Filipino and sushi isn't exactly a Filipino dish! It wasn't until maybe midnight that we turned on the movie. Though, we did sit down in front of the TV around, maybe, 11, and took quite some time picking something out. After L'Auberge Espanol (The Spanish Apartment), most left. I was about to leave, until Brent said he was going to probably watch another movie. Something we had joked about made him think of Garden State. So, despite the late hour, I stayed to watch that. He lied, and didn't watch it. When the movie was over, I looked over and he was asleep. Ha-ha. I love that movie. It alway...

"piece by peace" it doesn't make much sense but it kind of does sometimes, i think that it's like i've been given peace. but i've been pushing it away. because to accept the peace is to acknowledge that this is really it. it really is over. well, it's time to stop dwelling. it's time to stop refusing peace. as cliched as it sounds, everything really does happen for a reason. church was very good today. both the service and sunday school. and now it's time to go back. :-) hopefully, maybe, i'll be going to a friend's house tonight to watch foreign films! we shall see. ♥Tiffany♥

♥Tiffany♥

The concert was mucho fun. I missed the Gentle Suit because I fell asleep around 7pm and didn't wake up until 10:30! I was thinking...where do I need to be right now? Is it AM or PM? I was so disoriented. Ha-ha. Well, I got all gussied up and made it to the concert where I paid the very small cover ($3.00!) and joined my friends. A good deal of the GreenvilleScene staff was there, Julian was there, and a girl that Mike works with, Mandy, was there. Guess who was the drummer for The Winter Sounds ? Donovan Babb previously of Engineering & Boulevard! I greatly enjoyed the concert--especially when they broke out the accordion (you so had to be there). I had forgotten how much I enjoy indie rock. Afterwards, we were going to hang out with the band but decided instead to head to Julian's (he'd promised breakfast). So Brad, Ellen, Cate, and I had a yummy breakfast (toast, ham, fried eggs, bacon, potatoes!) cooked by Julian and just hung out talking and sipping on pulpy oran...

♥Tiffany♥

For the third year in a row, I celebrated 4 th of July at Camp Old Indian. I dressed in full class A (and complemented my outfit with a pretty red-and-white headband. Boy Scout chic !) so I could stand in line at assembly for old times sake. Then, I joined Caleb for dinner in the dining hall. As always, it was chicken tenders for family night dinner. Oh, but there was a surprise! Key lime pie! Oh and I was soooo yummy! "We haven't gotten sherbet all year!" "What? You lie!" "They don't server sherbet with lasagna this year." "Liars, all of you!" "No, it's true!" "Wait...what are you complaining about! You get key lime, freaking, pie!" I was contemplating not dancing. I didn't think I had dance in me. I was convinced otherwise by a few lovely friends. Anne Marie insisted that we have to dance together...and she's right! We do! So I did. I danced horribly, but VA thought I did good. And hey, really, in fancy...

Well, this is a new development. You're looking in on my life five times a day. But, to what end? What are you hoping to find? I sort of don't mind. But I have no retaliation.

Love, Tiffany

why must the night come and steal away the remains of my upbeat-ness? ♥Tiffany♥

I had lunch with Heather today. It was a wonderful lunch. She came over to my apartment bearing gifts of strawberries and Snapple. "So...let's talk about you?" "Me? Why me? I have too many questions for you!" So I answered questions while I made sandwiches. We packed up our food in grocery bags (because, clearly, we're avid picnic- ers ) and took my car downtown (because hers is filled with Coca-cola crates and extension cords). I had a terrible time parking, but I found a spot on the bridge, so even if I'm a sorry parallel parker , at least it was close to the park. We gathered our grocery bags and walked down to the park. We found a wonderful, shaded spot overlooking the river. We were lucky to find an unoccupied bench, I know. The plaque on it said, "The Thoughtful Spot." I think it may now be one of my favorite places. We ate and chatted. Our topics ranged from graduate school to marriage to pets to apartments. It made me laugh because I re...

Books I want to finish, in order of priority: "Divine Nobodies" by Jim Palmer "Sacred Marriage" by Gary Thomas "Wanting All The Right Things" by Shirin Taber Books I have started, but not finished, and probably won't any time soon, in order of last time opened: "A Girl's Best Friend" by Kristen Billerbeck "Authentic Beauty" by Leslie Ludy "Blue Like Jazz" by Donald Miller "The Tipping Point" by Malcolm Gladwell "Blessed Are The Bored In Spirit" by Mark Hart "How To Have That Difficult Conversation You've Been Avoiding" by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend "Christ The King" by Anne Rice Books I have on my shelf and really want to start: "Don't Waste Your Life" by John Piper "The Four Loves" by C.S. Lewis Books I want to read again: "Doing Things Right In Matters of the Heart" by John Ensor ♥Tiffany♥

Boys I haven't talked to in ages have been quick to send me messages and comments upon hear about my change in status. That's tacky and, really, I'm uninterested. I prayed for this over and over again. I begged God to make anything happen, even this. And, well, it did. And it's good. I never told anyone that my obsession (the one I pretended didn't exsist but tore me up inside) was affecting my walk with God. In fact, I'm pretty sure that I said the opposite. So, if I lied, I'm sorry. I don't know what to say now. There's a poem over at NRAA . But the only stanza I like is the very last one. because really when you think about it we're sort of kindred spirits anyway ♥Tiffany♥

i say that i'm sorry about doing things backward but i'm sort of not because look at you and look at me and look at who we once were the difference makes it worthwhile this will probably be a surprise to everyone but us i still have a lingering hope i'm telling it to go away because at the very least i think eventually we can be that cheesy cliché the one i hate to hear because really when you think about it we're sort of kindred spirits anyway

I've got nowhere to turn, I've got nowhere to hide, and I've got no alibi, You've been following me, you know my history, and no matter how hard I try, I can't explain away The way I feel today There's only one thing I can say: You, You've found me. You found me and You called me from the wilderness, From my cave of emptiness, Yeah, You, You've found me. You found me in the places of my lonliness You told me there was more than this, You captured me with tenderness, Yeah, You've found me. There was so many days, trying to figure out ways to explain what I feel inside, I tried to fill up my soul without using control, this desire never did subside, I'm ready to give in I know I'll never win The hide and seek that I've been in You, You've found me. You found me and You called me from the wilderness, From my cave of emptiness, Yeah, You, You've found me. You found me in the places of my lonliness You told me there was more than this,...